Post Background

How to get guys to chase you

Written by Emily on Jan 4th 2016

I love shoes, bags, accessories and all things fashion (because I’m a girl. So I also adore pillow fights and eat ice cream out of the tub without putting on weight, right?!). But seriously, I do love leather goods, especially designer leather goods.

Just over a year ago I set my sights on a cornflower blue Prada wallet. Classic, simple, beautiful. And at the time way out of my price range. So I stated saving, squirrelling away spare cash here and there, painting my own nails instead of weekly manicures at the nail bar, eating less frozen yoghurt… Real sacrificial stuff! Until eventually, I bought that wallet home and my life was infinitely better.

Now, this wallet is really no different from any other leather wallet. Designer, yes but that’s just a badge; an image. It’s probably made in the same factory as any other leather wallet (I don’t know this for sure! Disclaimer!) and imported on the same freight container. But it’s perceived value is higher because of the brand and therefore it’s financial value is higher. Now, on top of that, I had to work hard to obtain said wallet so its value for me suddenly went up even more. I felt a sense of satisfaction when bought that baby home, and honestly continue to do so every time I whip it open to pull out my credit card (which I should really stop doing).

Okay okay, I hear you cry. Nice wallet. What’s the point? Well when it comes to dating, YOU need to be a cornflower blue, classic, Prada wallet of high value. YOU need to be available to less of the population because of your unique supposed value. You’re not just some high street chain fake-leather wallet. You need to be worked hard for you because you’re in demand.

Take for example a friend of mine (*** fake name alert ***) Caz. Caz is the sort of friend who men flock to. Tall, skinny, beautiful, always wearing something fabulous. (I’m not sure why we’re friends come to think of it). She has no trouble attracting men when we go out. But when she does, instead of being a Prada wallet, she becomes a K-Mart special, aka, a try hard. She leeches onto the first guy who offers her a drink, literally tattoos her number onto his arm before he’s even asked for it and doesn’t get the hint when he politely says things like “well I should go talk to my friends” I’d LOVE to meet your friends!!!!

He senses her desperation, low self-esteem and suspects this leather wallet is, after-all plastic and tacky. She NEVER gets called the morning after. I use Caz as an example all the time (she loves it. Okay, she doesn’t know) because she is the perfect illustration of how NOT to value yourself and therefore, how not to attract the opposite sex.

Now, take a client of mine as a contrast example. Suzie (*** fake name alert ***) joined one of my programs and in just a few weeks, went from seeing herself as a plastic K-Mart purse to a stunning, valuable, leather Prada wallet. The effect was immediate. She became this confident woman who stopped caring if a guy liked her or not. Instead of laughing too loudly at his jokes in the hope he’d like her, she knew her worth and was the first to leave the conversation, leaving him wanting more. She began to see the value in herself and stopped being hung up on proving it to anyone else. She concentrated her expectations on her own behaviour only and let go of trying to control the behaviour of others. This power gave her everything she needed to become the sort of woman that men chase after because of her perceived value. Not only is she now an exclusive creature, not available to anyone and everyone, she also demands that anyone lucky enough to have her needs to work hard for it. The reward though, is totally worth it and she knows it! And so now, does her new boyfriend.

If you want to find out how to transform yourself from a K-Mart bargain into a Prada exclusive, the get in touch today. And remember, Caz may look like Claudia Schiffer but that’s not enough. Suzie on the other hand, behaves like she’s Claudia Schiffer. And that’s why she’s no longer single.

footer background
© 2015 the balance within